MADreads

Love her or hate her

October 12th, 2006 Sarah - Alicia Ashman

Because there certainly doesn’t seem to be much middle ground where Caitlin Flanagan and her book, To Hell with All That: Loving and Loathing Our Inner Housewife, are concerned.

Flanagan began her writing career with a series of essays about modern motherhood for Atlantic Monthly in 2001.  Since then she’s been making feminists everywhere furious: Ms. Magazine has even provided a how-to on decoding her “anti-feminist” writing.

So how is the book itself?  Well, if you believe a lot of the critics, it’s the first sign of the end of the world as we know it.  If you actually read the book, you might find that, although parts of it are indeed “whiny” (which has also been a favorite charge of the critics), a lot of it is also downright funny.  For example, in her opening essay on the modern wedding, she remarks:

“The problem of introducing drama to the wedding night is a big one, and Brides tackles it unflinchingly…The bride should consider packing her honeymoon suitcase with ‘a bunch of sex-research books’ and ‘two highlighter pens…’  If she’s absolutely determined to unveil a new trick, the bride might consider a suggestion that involves a 36-inch strand of acrylic pearls, preferably strung on nylon, and some water-based personal lubricant, although she is cautioned (in what may be the issue’s single best piece of advice) to ‘be careful with the necklace’s clasp.’” (p. 19.)

True, she may not be your cup of tea.  She may be, in your opinion, the worst possible person to represent women, mothers, and wives in national magazines such as The Atlantic Monthly.  But at the end of the day I can’t hate her.  Why?  Because she’s funny (see above).  And she can write. And because I believe all women have the right to their own opinions.  If that makes me an anti-feminist, then so be it.

Entry Filed under: Nonfiction